3 Seconds

#166

Friend,

I saw you do it the other day for just about 3 seconds.

It was there for 3 seconds until you realized it, and then as soon as you realized it, you took back control.

But for 3 seconds, you allowed yourself to feel. You allowed grief in. You allowed yourself to be human. You allowed yourself to be you.

But then you realized it, and you put a stop to that nonsense in a hurry. You couldn’t let grief have its moment, because you were terrified that if it had its moment that it would have you.

So you took back control. You chose to be numb.

I don’t want you to be controlled by your feelings. When feelings are your master, then you are a slave to the changing winds, but if you don’t even allow feelings to be a servant (literally to serve you), then you are denying a good gift of God.

Feelings are a wonderful servant, but a terrible master.

When you don’t allow your feelings to serve you, then you are only forcing yourself to a greater burden that will eventually break under the crushing yoke of grief.

You’ve trained yourself not to feel, so you have to begin the slow process of training yourself that it’s 1. ok to feel and 2. how to feel.

So it’s ok.

Try it for four seconds.

Love,

Aaron