The Exhaustion of Explanation

#78

Friend,

About a year ago, I was on crutches for about 2 months. I had strained my calf muscle, in an incredibly lame way, and I had to not only be in pain as I was healing over 2 months, but I also had to share the same lame story again and again as I encountered people about what happened to me.

Life is pretty exhausting when you have to explain yourself all the time.

Sometimes what you are explaining is obvious to people. The cast, the crutches, or the bandaid gives it away, but I think the harder-to-explain things are the circumstances that aren’t obvious to people.

People notice you choking up, hesitating, and overwhelmed, and then you have to break out the explanation:

• “I’m having a hard time right now as I’ve just lost my job and unsure what my next step will be.

• “I’m having a hard time right now as 5 years ago, I lost my Dad this month, and every year around this time I’m not quite myself.

• I’m having a hard time right now, my depression has flared up again, and I know getting out of bed and getting dressed doesn’t seem like much to you, but it was a lot to me.

Most of the time people mean well, and they don’t intend to give you an emotional workout after you’ve run an emotional marathon.

That’s why you need a few people who you don’t have to explain yourself to.

C.S. Lewis once said, “Friendship begins at the moment that one person says to another, ‘What! You too. I thought I was the only one.”

I hope you have those friends, and I’m honored to be your friend.

Love,

Aaron